[ He's not exactly great at articulating his own feelings a lot of the time. Listening to the feelings of others, offering empathy? That comes easy to him, but really opening up is hard. Skye is worth trying, though. ]
I think... it felt lonely, even around other people, because I wanted you there, too.
[Was she pushing it? Maybe, but she doesn't sound angry like she did before. She sounds like she knows exactly why he didn't have her there. It doesn't mean that she still isn't hurt by pushing her away like that, but she understood it.]
There are times when it's worth it. It's just been hard. Feels like I'm sitting on a lot of stuff I can't tell Steve and I guess it puts me in a weird place.
[ There's a pause before he answers and it's with a tightness in his voice that he finally does. ]
HYDRA things. I don't know how much he really knows about what happened to me. He's probably the strongest person I know, but he takes blows to himself a lot easier than blows to other people and I don't like hurting anyone if I can help it. Which I obviously suck at sometimes, but I'm trying.
[ With everything that's happened the last few years, everything the Avengers have done in the wake of SHIELD crumbling, Bucky knows that some of them are still out there, but a great many aren't. He's tried not to keep tabs, though. Revenge isn't the way to healing. Or so the experts say. ]
I'd rather just have everyone I care about live a long, safe life.
I mean, I'm not sure how I can compare to Steve Rogers but...
[It does mean a lot to her to hear him saying that, even if it also makes her feel nervous. If it wasn't for him, she wouldn't worry about going home. Not unless he was there with her.]
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morethan084) wrote2018-08-10 12:40 pm
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[Running her fingertips up and down his forearm, Skye lets out a content sigh.]
I missed this.
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[ He's not exactly great at articulating his own feelings a lot of the time. Listening to the feelings of others, offering empathy? That comes easy to him, but really opening up is hard. Skye is worth trying, though. ]
I think... it felt lonely, even around other people, because I wanted you there, too.
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[Was she pushing it? Maybe, but she doesn't sound angry like she did before. She sounds like she knows exactly why he didn't have her there. It doesn't mean that she still isn't hurt by pushing her away like that, but she understood it.]
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[ He agrees with a sigh. ]
I fucked up and I'm lucky you're giving me a chance to make it up to you.
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[Skye lifts her head to look at him, a playful smile tugging at her lips.]
Multiple times, actually.
[Pressing a kiss against his chest, Skye reaches up to push his hair out of his face as her smile fades a little.]
But I get it. It's not like I'm great at talking about my feelings either.
[Or anything about her personal life really.]
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There are times when it's worth it. It's just been hard. Feels like I'm sitting on a lot of stuff I can't tell Steve and I guess it puts me in a weird place.
[ Even admitting that is a big step for him. ]
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Stuff like what?
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HYDRA things. I don't know how much he really knows about what happened to me. He's probably the strongest person I know, but he takes blows to himself a lot easier than blows to other people and I don't like hurting anyone if I can help it. Which I obviously suck at sometimes, but I'm trying.
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I can't even imagine what you went through but, you can talk to me about it if you want to. I'm here for you.
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[ He does, too. He knows that he can trust her and that she does mean it and he turns his face into the touch. ]
I'm not sure where to even start.
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[But that would also mean leaving here, and if she's being honest, she's not in a rush. Especially now.]
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[ With everything that's happened the last few years, everything the Avengers have done in the wake of SHIELD crumbling, Bucky knows that some of them are still out there, but a great many aren't. He's tried not to keep tabs, though. Revenge isn't the way to healing. Or so the experts say. ]
I'd rather just have everyone I care about live a long, safe life.
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Yeah, well, 'safe' and this place don't tend to go hand in hand.
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[ And maybe he hasn't used the L-word yet, but it should say a lot that he's starting to put her in the same category as Steve. ]
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[It does mean a lot to her to hear him saying that, even if it also makes her feel nervous. If it wasn't for him, she wouldn't worry about going home. Not unless he was there with her.]
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[ He kisses her temple. ]
Probably smarter, too, but you've both got great legs.
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[And she's very clearly offended by his lying, judging by the way she can't stop smiling.]
No one is prettier than Steve Rogers. Except for you, maybe.